Finding Her Own Way in Ballet

March 31, 2025

An Interview with Sophie Rebecca

BY EMMALY WIEDERHOLT

Sophie Rebecca is an adult ballet dancer based in the UK. She came to dance at age 33 and has since then taken and passed several Royal Academy of Dance (RAD) exams as well as been featured in films and performances. As a trans woman, she has become known for sharing her experience dancing through transition. Here, she shares her journey as an adult dancer and her perspective on being a trans dancer in the very gendered world of ballet.

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What was the impetus that got you interested in ballet?

I actually fell in love with ballet like a lot of little girls when I saw some dancers on TV. That was one of the first moments I experienced gender dysphoria. I told my mother I wanted to be a ballerina, and she gently said, “Boys aren’t ballerinas.” I wasn’t sure why people thought I was a boy. I always wanted to do ballet, but I was conscious that it’s a gendered world, and I learned from school that you don’t deviate from gender norms because you get beaten up. I was constantly bullied and beaten up.

It wasn’t until my late teens when I was semi-independent with some money that I tried to explore ballet. I didn’t transition until my mid-30s, so I was presenting as male. I started dancing for about three months with a teacher, and I absolutely loved it. She rang my home one day and spoke to my mum that she couldn’t teach the class that week. My mum didn’t know I was dancing and told her I was a cross-dresser. The teacher then didn’t feel like she could teach me anymore. That ended quite abruptly.

Every time I moved somewhere, I looked for ballet schools for adults in the Yellow Pages. Eventually, I found my teacher, Lynne. I sent her a message saying I wanted to dance but was transgender. She didn’t care and said, “Come on down.” It was early on in my transition, and I didn’t have the confidence to go there as the real me, so I defaulted back to presenting as male for the first six months. I had group class presenting as male and private class presenting as female. Day-to-day, I was still going to work in my male persona. That one hour a week that I got to be me and see myself in the mirror dancing was so liberating and powerful. To dance as myself was incredible. Now, my teacher Lynne had to remember two names. Once, in the group class, she corrected me by my female name, but no one knew who she was talking to because there wasn’t another Sophie in the class. Eventually, people realized long before I came out because of my boobs, because I was transitioning. I told one of our older dancers that when we came back from term, I would be Sophie. I expected her to be a bit resistant. She said, “Well yeah,” and pointed at my boobs. I didn’t want dance to be another prisoner of my perceived gender.

What has your journey been like, specifically taking the RAD exams?

Once I started dancing as my true self, it snowballed. I said to Lynne it was a shame I could never do exams. She asked why not, and I said I presume there are rules against people like me taking the exams. Lynne happened to be a Royal Academy of Dance (RAD) board member. She was going to a board meeting the next day and said she would ask. It was the first time they’d ever come across it back in 2015. They re-worded their inclusion policy. Basically, anyone of any gender can now do any exam as long as the dancing standard is attained.

All the sudden, I had something to work towards. I went from studying one day a week to two to three to four. I loved spending time in the studio. Within 18 months, I took my first exam, and I got a merit by the skin of my teeth. It was such a wonderful moment, and it was recorded by the BBC. I didn’t just pass; I got a merit. I’ve done several exams since. I just lucked out that my teacher had been RAD trained and was an RAD teacher and board member. There used to be age ranges. There are no maximums anymore, but there are minimums.

Are there one or two performances or projects you’d like to share more about?

The first chance I got to dance on stage was with a film crew, not an audience, in The Lady that Dances in 2018. I’d been dancing for three and a half years at that point. What was great about that project was it was trans led. Lynne and I choreographed the dance. It’s painful to watch as a dancer because of shots where I’m not turned out or sickled, but it’s a beautiful film.

Later that year I took part in my first performance with my school, dancing with four other adults. The piece before was danced to Craig Armstrong’s Finding Beauty. Now the song is burned into my psyche with that feeling of waiting in the wings as my heart started racing with nerves, adrenaline, and excitement. That incredible feeling you get before you step onstage was fabulous. I remember coming off stage, and one of the teachers said, “Listen.” I hadn’t even realized the applause we were getting. People were being very generous to us. That was incredible.

The Lady that Dances went around the internet. I got approached by Charlene Campbell Cary from Ballet Beyond Borders, a program based out of Missoula, Montana. At first, I thought someone was trying to lure me to a red state to murder me. Why would this woman who is an incredibly experienced dancer and choreographer want anything to do with me, a middle-aged barely consistent dancer? She came over to the UK and saw me in the studio so she could see where I was technically, and she went away and constructed this dance to Chopin for me. I flew thousands of miles to a red state to learn a 10-minute Chopin piece accompanied by a live concert pianist and performed alongside four girls who were incredibly talented. I was 38 after dancing for four and a half years. As long as I didn’t fall flat on my face, I was very proud to be there. Jetlag and being in the studio six or seven hours a day for a week at my age took its toll. It took a lot of dedication, but I pulled it off. No one likes watching videos of themselves, but watching it, I had to give myself credit for how far I’d come.

Do you feel that being a trans ballet dancer is becoming more accepted?

In terms of legislative stances, it’s scary. We’re moving backwards. Back in 2016, 2017, 2018, when I was in the media, I was one of the few transgender dancers out there. Lots of people reached out: parents and schools with transgender kids asking for advice. I helped where I could. There was a transgender dancer who was in her late teens, and she was becoming incredibly self-conscious about her body as things began to show. I shared techniques I used to make sure nothing was ever visible.

Ballet dancers are like thoroughbred racehorses. If you want to dance with a major ballet company, you have to come with a certain build. Ballet has become a bit more liberal in recent years. We’re making small moves in allowing dancers to be healthier than we used to. But if you are a trans person on blockers and hormones and no one knows you are trans, what would stop you from becoming a professional if you met that balletic standard? No one would know you were trans, so there’s every possibility we’ve had more trans dancers than we realize because they meet the beauty standard. I’m 6’2”. I walk into a room and stand out.

There’s Chase Johnsey, who danced with the Trockaderos and then got hired by English National Ballet for a season. And there’s Ashton Edwards at Pacific Northwest Ballet. Ashton isn’t trans; they’re non-binary as far as I’m aware. But Ashton meets the aesthetic for what is expected in ballet. What’s lovely to see with Ashton is the freedom; it’s not a thing at PNB.

What would you say to another adult who did not train as a child in ballet but is interested in trying it?

It’s a common misconception by adults who want to dance that you have to look a certain way or get your leg up high. I came in at the age of 33, and I’ve achieved distinctions at grade 8. That took a lot of work and dedication. At my peak, I was dancing six to seven hours a day. You don’t have to take it as seriously as I did, but I like exams because it’s nice to have a target to work for. It’s a good way as an adult of marking and proving yourself. The adult ballet scene is huge and only growing. I’ve never had a problem in the adult ballet community, even as a trans woman. Everyone is here for love. Everyone is supporting each other and wants each other to succeed. There’s none of the rivalry that gets bred in a professional setting. I’ve danced with people in their 60s and 70s. It gives me a lot of hope that at that age I’ll still be dancing.

What’s next for you?

I’m closing in on 50. COVID hit me quite hard. I had a lot of performances lined up for 2020, which all fell through. I had the big surgery in 2023, which took me out of ballet for three months. My pelvic floor has been somewhat rearranged, so it’s about building up that strength again. But three months before going into surgery, my wife and I had a baby. I always knew that ballet would take a backseat to raising a child, and it very much has.

Any other thoughts?

I was very lucky that Lynne always encouraged me to dance with the younger students because I was doing the same exams as them and I needed to train more than the adult classes offered. I didn’t really want to. I didn’t want to impose as someone in my 30s in a class full of teenagers. I was resistant. I didn’t want it to cause friction at the school, because transgendered people are wrongfully portrayed as predators by the media. I didn’t want to cause the school trouble. We did a piece for a show in February 2023 from Swan Lake. The camaraderie was wonderful, even though I was the only adult in the show. I felt so self-conscious. These girls had this wonderful bond, but they always made a point of including me. It was my last performance. In April of that year the right wing came for me hard. Somebody in the UK said I was dancing at the Royal Ballet. It really grabbed hold; people said I was denying women their place. I was getting so many death-threats a day. It was horrible. The girls saw it and gave me a massive hug and asked if I was okay. I know quite a few adults that dance with youngsters. I think it can be a beautiful symbiotic relationship.

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To learn more about Sophie, visit sophiedancer.co.uk.