Flask Your Way Through March’s Dance Shows

BY RYAN KELLEY AND EMMALY WIEDERHOLT

flask

Are you considering seeing a dance show at some point this March? Might I make a suggestion? Don’t go dry.

Yes, that’s right. Take a flask. Sip your way through port de bras, kicks and turns. Glug your way through duets making use of negative space. People go to movies or music shows and enjoy a light beverage; why can’t they do the same for dance?

Your dance-drink guru Ryan is here to guide you. Ryan pre-parties for dance shows the way sports fans tailgate or the way groupies line up outside a venue hours before the show. His devotion to dance is unparalleled. Who is he? Oh just a regular Joe. He’s in marketing and goes to the gym after work. But come the weekend he is dance’s greatest fan, eagerly awaiting the hottest classical, contemporary and ethnic dance shows.  He blows off girlfriends and wastes untold savings on liqueurs in savage anticipation of the newest dance premiers. He diligently plans his dance calendar for each month, carefully considering the perfect libation for each show which he will bring in his flask.

I know what you’re thinking: “I’m going to a dance show, but how do I know what drink to bring in my flask?” Let Ryan guide you. And remember, never mix the words dance show and dry.

Ryan Kelley flasking

Sometimes it’s best to flask incognito!

Ryan’s tips for March dance-viewing:

 

Going to see an experimental work in progress? Something raw and unfinished? I have two perfect drinks for this type of show.  The first is an “Unfurnished Apartment.” Gin, simple syrup, champagne and mint.  After a couple sips you’ll notice it’s missing something.  And it is…purposely. I can’t tell you what though, so embrace this funky drink.  Don’t mess with a work in progress kids.

And if you’re not a fan of gin please make a “This Will Totally Change BTW.” Vodka, pineapple, cranberry and triple sec.

 

Going to see a classical ballet? Something along the lines of Swan Lake or Giselle? I could be off here, but isn’t ballet one of the many beasts that triggered all you dancers to get into the biz anyway?  If this is not the case, this drink ain’t for you. However, if you can relate, please make a “I Can Still Do That, Right?” Blend cantaloupe, lime juice, Cointreau, and tequila until smooth.  Enjoy.

Other options for the drink name:  “Dang, I Should Really Get My Ass in Ballet Class Tomorrow.”

 

Going to see a college dance showcase? Does it feature six pieces by different members on the faculty?  You’ll definitely want a “Facultea Delight.” Steep two bags of passion fruit tea in whiskey, infuse that shit, and add lemon. The faculty concert was never more enjoyable.

 

Going to see a site-specific piece in your local park or art museum? Let’s make the “Geo-Targeted Dancer.” Muddle rosemary and peach + whiskey + lemon juice + maple simple syrup. You never know where dance, or you, might end up!

 

Remember dance viewers, flasks are supposed to be discrete.  Stance on Dance is not responsible for any drinking tickets given out for the month of March.  Please Flask responsibly.

cherryfinal

What if THIS was in your FLASK?